The light

Folder:

old poems

The Light

I have dreams of her appearing at my door in a white dress,

Heaven falling behind her,

She smiles and says those words I loved to hear her say,

Then the smile fades and the door slams, Again im left in darkness not knowing what will happen next,

I see a speck of light under my door, I lift my heavy head from my pillow to open the door,

The light fades and she falls further away,

I run down an endless hallway chasing my dream,

The faster I run the further away it seems,

Still I see her face, That keeps me running,

Walls are put in my way, rivers to deep to swim and yet I keep going,

The walls I clime with ease, The rivers I cross,

Hoping to find the end of this void I keep going,

The light stops,

Again im left in darkness,

Again wondering if it will last,

Time passes and im still in the darkness, Being lost in my own memories of the past,

What could I have done?,

What should I have done?,

What I should not have done,

I try to find the doorway so I can leave this dark room,

Than a light comes on,

The door is bolted shut, a sick since of humor kicks in,

Im being held on my own will under lock and key,

Angry, I pound on the door,

I notice blood on the door, I look at my hands,

My bloody knuckles caught my eye,

The light in the room kicks off,

Again I waken,

It was all a dream,

Still my hands hurt, I gaze down at them,

Blood coming from my knuckles,

I herd a voice,

But it couldn’t be who I think it is,

Her voice was stained in my mind,

It was her,

She said the things I loved to hear her say,

My heart stops to her presents,

I lift my head again so I can listen closer,

Than she starts speaking in harsh hurtful words,

My head beings to pound and my teeth grind,

Although I deserve this treatment, I don’t like get it,

Soaking myself in my own tears I beg her to stop,

More pain rushes to my ears as they began to bleed,

She stops after so long,

My door opens,

There is where she stands,

Her and that heavenly light falling behind her,

I approach her,

She still stands there staring at me,

I tell her how I feel,

Still she stands there speechless,

I go to hold her in my arms she backs away,

I feel different,

I look at myself, I start to fade away,

This is when I realize im dead to here,

So why do I try?,

I back up with what’s left in my soul and shut the door in her face,

I realize that it was all a dream

I will never stop loving her,

I still dream of her, they’ll never stop,

Than I move on with my life,

When I see her I never tell her what I feel,

It wont do any good,

Still I dream,

Still I live,

Still I love,