in my room absorbed by radiohead, i realize the grass is always greener on the other side,
cradled by my lack of sleep, i'm alfie - preparing myself for the many paths that will soon collide,
already one, but more will soon feel similar hurt, abandonment, anger at my deception,
i've set the wheel in motion - breaks don't matter, never intended pain via this snowballed misconception,
used myself by using others, even with faux nurturing the emotional connection still grows,
ventured to the other side of the fence and now i desire home, can i?, only the unknowable surely knows,
even at this second the madness gains momentum, i need only one close friend who truly cares,
but i have none that really do, i look for understanding - in return i get nothing but blank stares,
what matters in this world can only be described as an everlasting, meaningful impact one person can create,
i make none, no connection with the public, no attachment with an individual, from the standard life i deviate,
tears heard only by those who cannot help, someone rescue me, someone tell me what i want,
wisdom and intellect have no power, what i must choose - unknown by even the greatest savant.