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at the apartment, the fountain hills water park, bowling...

a burning feeling in my chest as I look at our old photos,
reminising keeps me from sleep like I just popped 50 NoDoz,
I can't get over this loss, I keep trying to replace you,
I ruined it beyond repair, never to catch up as I chase you,
but I still try to, through these words, through this forever stretching distance of entropy,
I keep telling myself, plainly disillusioned, that you and I are still meant to be,
and I believe it, more and more every day, as each girl fails in comparison,
but this is only half of the story, after I attacked it, her heart doubled its garrison,
I'm alone, left drinking, thinking, to bartenders winking,
the realization of my situation leaves my hopefulness shrinking,
but I still hope you'll read this, I still hope my words may move you, I still hope you can forgive me,
the trifecta of each no can be placed in any order, I know, but so desperately I'm trying to relive you and me,
I wish I could have never stumbled upon those pictures,
I could delete them from my computer, but in my head they're now permanent fixtures,
I wish every sorry could mean more to you, every supplication could hold more merit,
I know they don't, every day, can do nothing more than try to grin and bear it...