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Fooling Around.
Yesterday, you said something...something unforgettable...something that broke my heart.
When I first met you, you coaxed me out of my shell.
I was always a kid that remained to himself, but you told me "This way. Come."
You always directed our conversations, made them about whatever you wanted to talk about.
And, I gave you everything without a question; secrets, stories, sex, ect.
Nothing was off-boundaries. Because I thought you truly cared.
But, the undeniable truth arose, and you left.
But, before you could leave, you had to establish what our former relationship was to you.
It was somethign purely met to tear me down. A phrase, which it's only purpose was to completely destroy me. A sentence that I had repeated numerous times afterwards. A title I wore like a brand.
" I had no problem fooling around with you, while I was still talking to Jeremy, but Jeremy was my main focus because I liked him."
"fooling around"
"But Jeremy was my main focused. I liked him."
Was that all I was to you? Sure, I may not have have fell in "love" with you.
But, you were more than a hookup, more than a thrill...I cared about you.
And, after those venom soaked words crept into my brain and laid a nest, I began thinking.
What if he's not the only one? What if all my past relationships saw me in the same eyes has him? Was I just some 'Piece of Action" in my previous relationships opposing views? Is that all I ever will be?
...It wasn't the fact that you said it, but what really made my soul ache, was the possability that you weren't the only one who had thought of me that way...and that's what made my, what was a nightmare, a reality.
