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Rudy & Lucy
Last night was enjoying a bowl of mulligatawny
When I started thinking about Rudy Giuliani
I believe he favors suits by Armani
I understand he has a chauffeur who's Afghani
OmanI
Almost forgot
To tell you about Lucy
Lucy was a gal I once knew, see?
We used to go out drinking all night
One thing about Lucy, she never got tight
She always remained loose
Loose as a goose
I used to call her 'Loosey Goosey Lucy'
Things didn't go well for Lucy for awhile
She started using meth
That meth'll really do a number on ya
You know who introduced her to meth?
Her friend Ethel
Omit the details for the time being
Lucy got married to a guy named Rick
I don't wanna say this too loud
Rick was supposedly er..very well endowed
This is just a rumor you know
When asked if it was true, all Lucy would say was
Rick? He..Rick hard!
Oh.
Just as some predicted
Lucy became addicted
In order to keep getting the stuff
As you know, an addict can never get enough
She became a member of organized crime
I guess she had the time
The story was all over the press
'Rudy Takes On Organized Crime.
Says He's Ready to Prosecute'
But he was never able to prosecute Lucy
Why?
She was so cute, see?
I love Lucy
Doesn't everybody?
