On my walks at sunset
I still hope
you’re the one who cares
what’s in my head.
Even when most of the seconds
I am wondering why
and my pillows have soaked in so many tears
they could probably
fill your sink when you finally get out of bed.
I tear out all these thoughts and toss them out the window
it feels like I am throwing you off the road
maybe
they’ll grow a garden.
Maybe I’ll get to make the colors into space
instead of space into color
like they usually
expect me to do.
When you have learned to let it go
I haven’t been told that way
I want to be the hand under your head
without being over you.
I am sick of caring about the wrong things
so if they wonder
why I don’t write anymore…
there are other
ways to heal.