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My arse is burning

It's red raw

From the curry the night before

Too much chilli and curry paste

Was it cat or dog i ate

Not sure

So get on the phone to my mate

Wife answers

Shouts John the phone

But his arse stays glued to the throne

We both ate food

Origins unknown

Was it garfield

Or fido

So much spice we will never know

I need the bog

I got to go