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Cracked Ice
You put me in my place
but I knew just where I stood before
the ice was always thin and unstable
I guess I thought I could deny it
pretend that I was something better
these illusions wont keep me safe and warm now
all I wanted was to keep you home
I know how easy it would be to lose you
its so cold when you are gone
I know Im not enough to make you stay
The winter is my enemy now
its teeth and claws tear into me sharply
with no arms to keep me protected
each bit of ice freezes my bones
I wish my heart would freeze the same
But the beat just gets slower and harder to bear
its been a long time
since your name broke through my frosty lips
maybe Im finally giving up
I see my reflection the way you see me
now I cant blame you because I know I was wrong
Its going to be a long season
and even longer to heal me of this sickness
I wish it was easier to change
but I have all the time in the world
even if my own soul eats me alive
I hope its always summer in the afterlife
maybe I will be reborn into something I can control
until then I keep on shivering and praying for change
someday you will see me frozen beneath the ice
you will know I understand
and I will know I deserve to be there
