My Agnostic Light

Two o'clock in the morning
my eyes are open wide.
Missing him so badly
even though he's by my side.
I feel the love between us
getting stronger day by day.
If we'll ever be together
is still something I can't say.
But I know I'll wait forever,
pathetic, so it seems.
But I know a better man
is even hard to find in dreams.
How I ever got so lucky
a man like him fell for me.
And how I ever let him go
is beyond what I can see.
I have never been more blinded
then by my own agnostic light.
To dwell on little things
and start unrealistic fights.
But now is it too late?
Did I finally push away,
the one that that I loved
that made me happy everyday?
How could I get more hurt?
This form of self mutilation.
I look so near obsessed
I'm my own humiliation.
I, alone, am not strong enough
without him by my side.
Which is why I'm laying here
still, my eyes opened wide.

6-10-09

View sstrehlo's Full Portfolio