Your expletives spread across my face
Like the spit coming from your lips
Acid burning through to the very core
Of what used to be
Or really never was
As I try to get up the courage to smack you
Or punch you
Or find some way
To let this hatred and pain erupt
Without letting it hurt me anymore
I spread my arms out to an endless sky
That's come crashing down on me
From high up above
A cloudless sky
Waiting to crush me with the weight of its convictions
That I am always wrong
That I cannot, ever be good enough
So I fall with the world
I drown with the fish
And die in no one's arms
As they hold me for dear life
Because they love me.
August 13, 2003