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Hit Or Miss
Someone saw me falling
Off a cliff; off a precipice
I slipped, and fell
After just one, sweet, kiss
The bottom's coming fast
So please just tell me this:
Are you real or are you fake?
And did I hit, or did I miss?
March 2, 2004
I think the main reason I really like this poem is the fact that it's short, but still retains a very powerful, yet simple, point. :)
I also read your quotes in your bio. I gotta admit, it's rare that I find anyone who's actually seen Finding Forester/Beautiful Mind who geniunly liked them as much as I did. *Laughs* Power to the people who prefer movies with a point
A great, mood encapturing piece of writing. I also enjoyed the rhythm to this poem and thought your rhymes were well crafted. Only one thing that caught my attention, was that it seemed that the last line was slightly too long. Thank you for posting.
Daniel.
"...and we fall as if we never really mattered." -Pete Yorn
great write... i like the flow of this poem. it's got a rhythm that makes you inhale sharply at the last line. very sweet.
thanks for checking out my page... :o)
this is short but well expressed