im a fake.

a naked body fell from the sky into my arms. unsure of the meaning i dropped it and stepped away staring. what am i to do with you? where are we to go? the body lay face down and lifeless. i poked at its bare skin and peeled away its scabs. its flesh was cold on my hands and i felt the remainder of its soul leak into mine begging for me to help.
I turned the body over and found myself looking into my own eyes.

as i spoke to the body i heard my voice repeat back to me in my mind every answer ive begged for. every truth i have denied. the body tensed up and let out a scream. i didnt move or even flinch.
here we are.
"its just you and me" i said laying my coat over the body.
i want to know where i end up. i want to know what happens to my family. i want to know if i ever clean up this mess.
i trace the scars on my arm and look down at the body, whos scars are open and bleeding out.
i watch my own eyes tell me that things wont get better until i see myself in my own skin.
imafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafakeimafake.
the body holds my arms to its chest and i feel reality.
this is what becomes of me. this is where i end up.
i take the body to the edge of my existence that i am all too familiar with and push it of the side.
i watch as it tumbles and rolls until i can no longer follow its path.

i retrace my steps to where the body fell. i sat in that spot for hours thinking of what i should i make of all this. i guess i was freaked out. but i guess at the same time i was just fine.
for the first time in my life i saw myself in my bare skin. i saw myself for what i really am. i guess if i can accept that then i can start being more comfortable with who i am? i guess theres no way to find out by sitting in this spot thinking about it.
i got up and continued forward, thats the best path i can find to walk.

x

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