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And it's Monday.



This weekend was a pretty good one. Played a bit of music, smoked a fair amount, got to be with my lovely lady as well as hang out with the guys. Not too shabby. Sophia's first birthday party was yesterday and we managed to get a good chunk of both sides of the family to come on down. Everyone was in good spirits and we all watched as Sophia got cracked out on sugar and got into all of her presents. The giant tennis ball Sean's parents purchased for her was probably her favorite as far as we can tell.



Now I'm back at work, and it feels pretty good. That rainstorm we had yesterday really cooled down the air, but I'm sure it won't last us more than the afternoon. The good news? Only one week left until we head to Lake Erie! Man, I am excited. We're going for a full five days this time. It'll be a real vacation, and I think we all deserve it. There may only be six of us this time as Larry is in California and Joe can't afford to go (re: also doesn't want to go). Josh may or may not be coming, and we all hope he does. No matter what the situation ends up being, I know that we'll have a great time. We're bring lots of supplies and I think while Kevin is bringing his Wii, I will most likely be bringing my PS3. Yes, we're going on vacation with some video games for good measure.



We spend a lot of time relaxing in the condo up in Port Clinton, OH. It sits right on the shore of the lake with its own private beach, as well as a swimming pool and an outdoor hot tub. We swim plenty and make sure to go out, look for flea markets and decent-looking restaurants, visit all the usual spots and do whatever else we feel like doing. We are like-minded in the sense that we feel that vacationing isn't about doing AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE within the alotted time, as much as it is about simply kicking back and enjoying the time you have to spend.



I told Megan that I love her. And it felt good; it felt right. When the words came out of my mouth, there was a moment of clarity where all I wanted to see was her reaction. Her expression became dully surprised, and then instantly happy. The first thing she said, as much as you'd expect it to be "I love you too" was actually "... Really?". I do feel that I love her, because otherwise saying so would feel false. It doesn't, and I enjoy saying it to her. I like to make her happy, because she deserves to be happy. We talked a lot last night and I did my best to tell her everything from the heart. We spoke of her, and her family, and the two of us together - among many other things.



I think, though we may not be together forever, that at the very least we will be a good, and successful couple.



Kevin and I have talked about getting another webcomic together. I've also proposed to Pat and Kevin the idea of becoming a band once I move into the house on Ralph. I've spoken of putting together a book of poetry by the end of this month to send out to publisher's. I'm also trying to pick up my acoustic and practice once more. My endeavors are split and stretched much too far, and I find myself worrying once again that no matter what, I will never end up doing something that I love as a career.



I know now that I will not end up putting my book together, in part because I know that I'm doing it for all the wrong reasons and that it will be rushed in a terrible way. The pipe dream I've laid for myself is that by some slim, microscopic chance, I may end up being published, and that the money will solve a majority of my problems. So, realizing this, I don't really see any reason to continue stressing about having time to get it organized and bound. There isn't a chance in Hell it would be recognized anyway, so why bother?



I've reduced Muay Thai to once a week, and I think that it's for the best. Less exercise and less practice, yes, but I have been missing it so frequently lately on Mondays that there really isn't any sense in blowing money on something that I'm not getting constant use out of. That's my theory, anyway. I want to try to exercise more often on my own. I've been able to force myself to workout more often these days, and if I can continue to do so, my body will only look better and better. Honestly, I think that I look pretty damn good these days. One can always look better, of course, but I'm feelin' satisfied.



After purchasing my PS3, I find myself more engrossed in fighting games than I have been in a long, long time. It's sort of rekindled my old passion in a way. It also leads me back to thoughts of my last real dream - to create my own fighting game. Design the characters, the stages and the mechanics, help with writing and recording the in-game music, as well as do some voice-acting and art myself. A little self-indulgent perhaps, but nothing would make me happier. The man who made the Guilty Gear series, Daisuke Ishiwatari, lived that same dream. I imagine that, at least on some levels, he is a very fulfilled and content human being. I don't know how I could ever achieve this dream; what with my lack of technical knowledge towards the subject of creating video games and my overall lack of talent and motivation, but it sure would be incredible.



I'm depressing myself a little bit. It happens, I guess.