Note to a Friend

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Why did I say that to you?

I don’t even know why I felt like that.

When someone meets a person

And starts spending time with them,

Obviously things happen.

Personalities are attractive to me.

Yours is great.

It’s nothing special or unordinary.

It’s strange to be around it.

For a while, I was extremely affected by you.

Being around you caused certain feelings,

Sometimes excessively happy,

Sometimes bothered or depressed,

But I knew I could not replace

Someone so important.

How could I, even if you wanted me to?

So, why didn’t I keep it hidden?

It was eating me up everytime I saw you.

You have to tell someone when they look remarkably good to you,

At least just to get it off.

So, I brought it out.

Now that another situation

Has come up with another,

I’m afraid.

I’ve said, and believed, that I don’t see you the same.

You don’t affect me the same way anymore.

It won’t be a problem.

However, you’ve been gone for quite some time.

What happens if I still feel it?

And what if it’s not even the same –

What if you look even better to me than before?

What if, for some unfortunate reason, you’re no longer occupied

With your present situation?

Would that make a place for me?

As much as I would like that?

I wouldn’t want to.

I’ve promised another it wouldn’t happen.

I need some assurance.

If there is a possibility

For me to take his place,

And things unfortunately disappear

With me and this other person,

I hope that, until then,

There will be many more Shellacs,

Many more bars snuck into,

Many more pipes lit up.

Come home now.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

For Pam

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