My first hard love was a dirty deed done behind the closed doors of hotel bedroom with a heavy heart and a full glass of water.
This girl- was my rock,
a rock with a side of vitamin D to help with the come down so I would never know depression.
This girl took me both brain and body and chips me of my old prescriptions
like dried white paint on the concrete wall in a high school building.
breaching me of that old sterile feeling
because I never really minded being dirty in the first place.
My fingers ran through every womans hair feeling every strand please the tendon because box braids are...really-really soft..
But unfortunately this love was never good for me.
Because how could I add a hard drug to my dietary plan
my first love wasnt just a pretty face in a crowded hall
Because to my friends she was just the girl next door
but to me Molly was my only shot at happiness
and the fact I woke up the next morning, just as happy just a sane.
made the fact that it was real so much worse.
For I needed my depression to bring me back down and remind me that none of it was real so i wouldnt make the dumb mistake again.