Warped Perception

I give you my heart and my soul

I give you my body and my name

Its yours to do with as you please

may you or may you not swallow them whole.

I give you everything, do you do the same?

With every kiss from your lips you put me at ease,

but jealousy rots and I worry

that i am not your all.

The cold rage turning into burning fury

and for a moment, I reach for the phone to call

and then the fury halts---

I feel foolish, so very dumb

as I stare back onto my jealous faults,

feeling dull, feeling numb.

Would you hurt me? Would you shatter me?

Would you use me for a play toy?

Would you think that I would see

another fucking idiot-boy?

I know that you said you wouldn't wait

I know that I will for two years

to find out if our love formed by fate

but right now loneliness sears

threatening to swallow me

it laughs as it wickedly grins

turning into a fog that I can't see

through, accusing me of falsified sins...

My fear, turning around, twisting out my heart

driving me insane, tearing me apart.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written during my very volatile relationship with my ex. 2002/2003

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