PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

I know nothing of good, and evil.

I grew up in the world as it is

You can call it good or evil.

I grew up with a beautiful boy.

You could call him homophobic;

But I’m just brokenhearted

Because I remember how kind he was to me all of those years.

I learned so much from him about trusting others.

I never thought a prejudice he learned

Would make it harder for me to trust anyone else;

Now I’m just cold.

I get to know people well enough

To decide what role they could play

And then I go back to reliving the charade in my head;

Which he believed just as strongly as I did.

I wish I could say I was betrayed

But his loss made me callous enough

To manipulate others.

So I am weighed down by my on guilt

And when I’m contemplating my own shame,

I’m still imagining that I am holding him

And smelling his beautiful skin,

Like I used to imagine when we were friends.

And he stared at me with such intensity

Just waiting for the next joke to come.

The funny thing is I could not tell him how much I loved him then

Now I just cannot deny it.

You could say I’m more open

Or that I’m closer to closing down.

I’m still stuck in the world I grew up in.



10-07-2010