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I did what I said I wouldn’t do,

I broke a few promises,

I finally gave in.



9 months since the last time,

It’s not good, clever, it just hurts,

Not as deep as the previous cuts.



I'm not making this up,

Fresh pain with each throb in my arm,

I lied to you all, I'm not fine.



I feel like I've killed myself,

Like I’ve killed my lover,

My friends.



One stupid row with my mother,

How could I have let 'IT' lose?

How could I let my Demon do this?



A scratched letter S on my arm,

A letter to my lover,

Tears and blood mix pain increasing.



Salty tears on fresh cuts,

I know my lover hates me,

I don’t blame him, I hate me too.



My arm a mass of red and white,

Pale skin, red abrasions and blood,

Wrist to shoulder, and underneath too.



A combination of long and short cuts,

Some surface scratches,

Others drawing blood.



Coagulating on my skin surface,

Black under moonlight,

Not as deep as they could have been.



A light finger runs across raised skin,

Fresh pain, salty tears too stain my cheeks,

Each time I move my arm it hurts.



Do I hide it? Or let them see what they did?

They have no idea of the pain caused,

They not only hurt lover, friends and me too.



I just wanted to cut my pain out,

Let it escape from me, my life,

Take the pain away, but caused more!



Previous scars I don’t dare open,

Wanting so badly to,

I PROMISE I’ll NEVER let that happen!



Fading scratches, flesh subsiding,

A few bloody marks are left,

And the letter S, for my lover.



I meant to hurt my parents,

I never meant to hurt my friends,

I never meant to hurt my one true love,

All I can say is SORRY, and hope you forgive me!