On the Outside Looking In

I can no longer control this feeling
This heartache has grown to a searing pain
Here you are before me
And nothing can break me of this trance
My eyes dance with the movements of your body
The way your hips sway as you walk
Hands tucked gently into your pockets
A gaze that sits between adventure and determination
Caution and certainty
Doubt and longing
A gaze that is not too unfamiliar
I sit here as if in wait
But nothing has come
It is like dreaming
Something that seems so very real
That waking up is your greatest fear
I do not pretend to know your feelings
My own have betrayed me
A darkness has fallen over my mind
It is this struggle that stays my words
Fear of the unknown
Fear of the answer I never want to hear
This chasm is growing deeper
Each day I hide behind these walls
Throwing up locks after barriers that seem endless
But there is always the window
Always a glimmer of light illuminating your face
Beyond everything I know
Everything I dream of
I want to feel the life return
I want to look into your eyes
And see you looking back
Perhaps the day will come
When the cowardice fades
And I approach you free
The barriers lay crumbled
Locks lay broken
I take your hand
Look into your eyes
And say...