I really thought I was the exception
above it all
more than mortal
But then the knife to my gut
punched through my flesh
twisted and snagged
threatening to pull my humanity
inside out
in thick steaming ropes
After
there were sweat-drenched dreams
of torn limbs
flayed flesh
of beds burning as I watched
with an eerie smile
I didn't recognize myself
though I somehow
knew myself
Perhaps one day
that knife in my gut
will feel like just an extension of me
and I will walk the streets
with a vapid grin
blood-soaked shirt
knife handle sticking out
as if it's all so normal
As if each step I take doesn't jar the blade
as if each twist doesn't sear
with the steely reminder
of my failure