UNDETECTED RUSE

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JOURNAL#8

I'm sorry that you were a casualty from my ignorantly

made remark

I never intended to start any fires of rage

I only wished to douse the spark

like when I read 'Johny Got His Gun'

I knew then and there that the time for me had come

you were so very wrong in your walking away from me

I never once gave you credit for what you chose not to see

I just wanted you so much

only you

but I wanted to hurt you more

for not facing what you hadn't done

at least noticed me even once

you see, I so wanted you to be the one

but one can't project his feelings onto another

as affections so eagerly returned

yet at these crossroads of unclear confusion

lays the back breaking load of worry

from one so deeply concerned

I will miss you so very much when you have to go

but you on the other hand will not care about that

because the me I hid so well you never got the chance

to know

but remember my love leaves with you

along with these words expressed through verse

as emotionally true............

(written Nov.11, 1992 am)

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