BEFUDDLED

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JOURNAL#5

he likes his women pretty and so svelte

that they're just too skinny

though I don't mean to sound petty

my 'thin' thoughts aren't worth even one pinched penny

the longer I let these fanciful feelings flourish and

live the more I sense I appear to be a laugh less fool

it becomes a degree more difficult each day to keep

this ravaging emotion within while consciously

remaining cool

this role I half unwillingly play could be cast as duel

the unaware audience I perform before can be often

so carelessly cruel

only I know the full complexities of the truth so why

do I care

who but you after all can see the sorry shape of my

soul that to no other I could possibly bare

perhaps there is where lay the silent and unspeakable scare

for this is no longer simple role playing anymore

and I'm not just another player

into the darkest realm of distorted love I can only

helplessly stare

and imagine as the hopeless truth becomes apparently known

his angry unforgivable glare

so with the quick but reproachful help of my hand

my heart gives you yet another generous offering in

the form of my cryptic creative ware

in great yet almost desperate hope that over the

painfully jagged wall of unrequited love

your reading of this ache will somehow manage to get

me there..............

(Sept 17,1991 pm)

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