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comfort

battle weary tears

that have been repeatedly shot down

all across these pale trenches

called my cheeks

these soldiers of such worry

work their magic

at destroying my hope

but I know

I must keep my courage up

for you but for me

just as well

fear plays a part in all men's lives

but the smart ones just don't let it

rule their ways of thinking

they use the fear mercilessly

against itself

to bridge walls of darkness and dread

that ominously loom in their way

and win strategic points

over before thought to be impassable paths

and take back what is rightfully his own

heart is the greatest weapon

a truly good soldier possesses

without heart he is a drone bee

working for the collectives good

where any hope for himself is not even a

conscious thought

drones are fine admirable creatures

if you are a bee

but for a man to be any real good to

anyone

he must be as well

optionally good for himself

so he holds the choice

(in most cases)

whether to give his own life for a cause

or not

his heart has to help him to storm beyond

the fear

and fight the good fight

to in the end attain the love that most

of us crave

in his mind at that moment the love of

country

like the love of a good woman

is a war in hell

worth harrowing through

the end will rise

to make the fight worth the suffered wounds

of fear and the loneliness and bitter

isolation

that followed this soldier of such great

heart

across the booby trapped cold battlefield

that was placed between us

so put down your weapons

throw away your anger

let your fear

with mine

drain silently out of us

and into the grave I've just dug

for it

and pledge your love by forfeiting your

beautiful heart to me once again

such incredible love

is the food which my soul

in this dark swirling moment

can only survive on

I just pray that God doesn't view

my thinking that as being so terribly

terribly wrong

as I need you so terribly much this very moment

that I think I would even risk his wrath

to somehow get through to you right now...........

(Jan. 19, 2000)