desire is an ancient ruin
and many a man
has ventured out to that cruel chasm
with his heart bravely unsheathed
galloping blithely ahead like a beast
ready for the momentum
or so he ignorantly thinks
he parries for his just reward
LOVE
a gently thrown hanker chief
upon a most foul ground
we call such harsh unforgiving terrain
LIFE
there is no challenge greater
nor any gauntlet more precious
so very easy is this elusive being to covet
yet so very difficult to restrain
man pits himself against far better judgments
shaking himself to wonder
who is the greater fool
HE
or his desperately uncertain love
my but the hands grow numb
yet how their angry fists clench
to correct a thought to be wrong
being alone never felt more lonely
until the vague possibility of love
glares back at a previously only pale
existence
so leave me
as I am awash in self doubt and disgust
my wretched mistake has met its death
upon the now too obvious blade of cold and
unforgiving lust
self loathing
has never before felt so uncontrollably mean....
(Nov. 10,1996)