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SUCH HEART'S TRUTH (M.A.K.)
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JOURNAL #22 I so want to spend
even the simplest times
just with you
and sit on your balcony
kissing your fingers
as I ask you such endless lists
of silly things
like what size shoe do you wear
did you ever play doctor with the local
little girls when you were a child
how do you feel about women with big feet
or does it bother you that I am quite ignorant
about oh so very many things
I want to languish in the gaze of your love
and hide a kiss or two in each your open palms
or rub my cheek to yours
just after you've shaved
and ask you such quiet simple little things
like what do you call a butterfly in Arabic
and will you please say it slowly to me
so I can savor its sound
have you ever known a West Virginia hill billy
before
will you say my name often so I can store the
sound in my heart
and will you sing to me the first song that comes
to your mind
does it annoy you that I sometimes say or think
the most ridiculous things
I long to share with you some of my greatest
funny jokes as I look at you
so happy in my company
though you fight 'Such Heart's Truth'
know that you will be like so beautiful to me
so why do you think that this I truly know
may I touch your hair or be permitted to ask
you to lightly kiss my neck
just so I can feel how your mustache will feel
against its pale column
do you think that you will remember all these
silly little things
would it hurt or surprise you if I whispered
tearfully in your ear that I wished you loved
me enough to keep me there with you always
and not just so very silently yet sadly
in your aching heart
when I am no longer physically there
If so
then please know at least this much of what I
say forever
that, I not only love you infinity squared M.A.K.
but this very same mentioned love of mine knows
you well
so, other than these few simple warm thoughts
what else from the deepest part of my very
sensitive being
to you , could I possibly tell
well,
as without God
without you
my you
in my deepest
I would feel as if I were quite literally
nothing
a petal lost on the wind
searching again for her lost flower's latest
lovely bloom
this is what you mean to me
the warmth that fills my soul's every room
my adoration's very own groom............
I want you
feel my heart sing
forever
for you
my soul's groom!!!!
(Sept. 2, 1999)
