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A Big Mistake





It's been a long day and I am here just soaking for a bit.



I lost my temper earlier and thought I'd lose my wit!



This good hot bath will iron out my nerves, make me warm,



Thinking back on that stupid thing that brought me only harm.



All along I knew I had a problem with that car,



Then suddenly as fall grew cold, the thing refused to start.



I tried each trick I'd ever learned, but nothing did much good,



I'd twist the key, but no loud purr--I did everything I could.



It occurred to me that if I looked as ugly and as old,



I'd stay put too, so I commenced to make it look more bold.



Taping up the windows, I used newsprint for the glass,



I masked each inch of chrome or lights, I did the mirrors last.



I bought ten cans of "Hunter Green" in WalMart from the shelf,



I took it home and happily I painted it myself.



No longer did my car consist of unmatched fender parts,



The whole dang thing was foliage green, but still it wouldn't

start



I cleaned the windows, scrubbed the seats, and armoralled the

dash



I spent a fortune buying stuff, depleted all my cash.



It made me sick when I got in--the inside smelled so good!



But when I tried to start that thing, no purring like it

should.



I checked the oil, cause I know how, but my car was not

impressed.



I circled twice that stupid thing, gave it the "kick tire" test.



I changed the wipers, polished chrome, and checked the signal lights,



Cleaned out the trunk, wiped off the plates, I did everything just right.



I was looking for the gas can to pour gas across the seats,



The matches in my raging hand when I heard a voice so sweet,



"Hey, Sugar, What chu doin'?" my next door neighbor said.



"You need a jump there, Sweetie?  You know your battery's dead."