It hurts so badly
I just want to cry.
I want to call you.
But you won't make anything better
You can't.
That is what I have learned.
Depending on those who can barley stand themselves.
I can't call you.
I won't...
I won't pick up the phone.
I won't dial your number...
i won't listen to your voice...
I won't say what's in my heart.
"Won't you listen to me...
be there for me...
not you...me..."
Do you even hear the words I'm saying?
I know you care...
I know you do...
it's my fault I suppose...
isn't it always my fault...
when it dies, when it falls apart?
don't they
won't they all blame me?
not you
not your innocence...
can you really be this clueless?
this inept at interaction?
I suppose you must be...'
you wouldn't
you couldn't mean to break my heart.
But you have
You do...
You can't seem to stop
You can't seem to see
my hand on the door
My stuff already packed
I know you'll miss me...
but I wonder if you'll try to reclaim me.
I wonder if you'll know
that all I want is that.
for you to follow me
To prove that you in fact
want to try and make this work...
that I am not the only one trying anymore.