Here we are, the two of us,
in your bed. Or is it mine?
Who knows anymore, possession
is the least of my concerns.
Your arm is across my body, I couldn't
get away if I tried.
You move your head a little in your slumber.
Your coarse dark hair brushes my face, and
your fingers tighten, then relax in the hollow of my side.
Oh, how easy it would be to love you!
But I can't!
After having my heart stomped upon 3 times,
I vowed never to love again.
And I won't.
If I even let on that I give a damn,
I may lose you (more like I would).
Something inside me wants to love you,
to believe in you.
But no, never again. I need physical love
though, I am human afterall.
How did I ever get this way?
Never before would I have shared my body
and not my mind. But that was before.
Before I had to glue my heart so many times.
I HAVE RUN OUT OF GLUE!
I'll play until you leave me, then I'll move on.
It's the perfect plan, I'll never get hurt again.
And my plan works quite well.
Quite well, that is until I think
about this life that i'm living.
How long can I survive, holding back feelings
that are so powerful?
I should leave this bed, right now,
and never return.
Yet I can't. I'm scared to be alone,
and scared to be with you.
I can feel your breath on my neck.
It's too comfortable here, with you.
My body shakes with the war
my heart is waging against my self-preservation.
A tear escapes my eye, it falls on your cheek,
waking you.
You sit up, and hold me close, as I cry.
You don't ask why anymore,
you just stroke my hair.
And as I fall asleep, it seems that I could love you.
But I can't.