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i fell in love with misery

i accepted his presence regadless of what he did to me

he took away my innocence and shitted on my dignity

i fell in love with knowing a strong woman i would never be

i fell in love with the way he lied

i fell in love with the way i cried

i fell in love with the way sadness became my lifestyle

i fell in love with never having a reason to smile

i fell in love with the dark clouds after the rain

Fuck it you can say i fell in love with pain

i fell in love with the way he raised his voice

i fell in love with the way i held myself knowing this wasnt my choice.

i fell in love with the way his body touced my skin

i fell in love with hearing me screaming within

i fell in love with being a little girl not being able to understand

that i didnt do wrong but in fact that man

i fell in love with wondering if it was right since it continued to happen

how it would have stopped since he knew i was saddened

Tears ran down my face every night

and at a young age, what was i suppose to do... FIGHT

so i guess i fell in love even though in my heart there's only hate

everything in life happens for a reason, so i guess pain was destined to become my fate

i fell in love with wanting myself to be deceased

i fell in love with the way his strokes increased

i fell in love with him telling me to keep my mouth shut

i fell in love wih him not giving a flying fuck

i was only a baby you think he would care!!!!!

i guess i fell in love with knowing life wasnt fair

i fell in love with being emotionally scarred

i fell in love with being able to hold onto my secret this far

i fell in love with being dumb thinking if i had told someone they would not bother

so you tell me as a child if i loved being taking advantage of by someone as old as my father?

i fell in love with denying that these actions ever took place

i fell in love with the blows to my face

I FELL in love with never being able to trust

i fell in love knowing men are dogs sniffing for lust

i fell in love with the way he destroyed me in all

i fell in love with knowing since a child, niggas were my downfall

someone once told me people only do what you allow so you must love it if it continues

i wonder now if it still applies after hearing what a girl had been through

she was  only 14 with a future so bright it could blind you

2 scholarships,1st in her class,and a voice that could make you believe what she sang was true

too many late night visits to her bed

left her full of only semen and a bullet in her head

soooo

.... i stand here with my heart beating at an enormous rate

wondering if only i knew... she was a constant vitim of rape