you'll be reeling
writhing
dying a little inside
everytime
my eyes throw a dagger at your back
my words curse your heart
your love becomes laughable
in these moments
you are my mirror
and what a ghastly duplicate I see
I want it gone
liquefied
ready to mop up
wring out
dump
wash away
I go to rivers, lakes
creeks and oceans
where there is peace
the flowing water
the one thing that never stops
brings comfort
rocking chair, mother's bosom
the currents and waves mesmerize me
I am calm
calm and quiet enough to reflect
reflect on the beauty
beauty of eternity
of those things that simply are
always
constantly changing
ever present
softly praying
I remember my hand under yours
over your heart
in my hands
these shaky things
maybe if they can flow
maybe if they can be gentle
if they won't let go
maybe this wouldn't be
maybe your hand would always be
always be
within my grasp
longing to be