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THE SHY ONE
Low and behold,
I am placed on a path
not of my own making.
A twisting road of life
fashioned with other hands.
Should I forsake myself
and embrace it?
Murdering my soul,
and live as a soundless instrument.
Retiring my war-horn
and imprison my spirit for all eternity.
The deep recessed tears
pours out of my blinking eyes
for unknown feelings of unbreakable bonds
formed in the denial of fair relationships.
Smothering my spark
and starving my eternal flame
could never be the answer.
Indeed,
is the quest
the Oracle’s bedding?
My Lord rest on the mountain of the moon.
“Ngai,”
owner and giver of all life force.
Weave a web of interconnection
linking us to our ancestors and children.
I have a duty.
I have duties.
Yet I have a personal cause!
Comfort and security are treasures
unaffordable by those who wish
to burn as bright as the noon day sun.
Chisel my destiny,
carve out a legacy and
leave an enduring signature upon the land.
I am “the shy one.”
I am on a journey,
a hajj for self-fulfillment.
Searching for answers
and acceptance.
My personal place of belonging.
Looking into the mirror upon my reflections,
contain all the answers to my questions.
The beginning and ending of my long search.
I shall breathe my own breath
and forge my own path
towards a full life of vitality.
My flicker of light will not be snuffed out.
I want to live!
I pray the Peoples forgiveness.
“Amitu.”
“Arop.”
“Ngai,”
breathe life into the Nation,
placed it into “Mumbi’s” lap
under the Huge Sycamore.
There nine daughters
form the Clans of our ancestors.
Our name Kikuyu,
keeps the secrets of the tale.
We are a merry people who love laughter,
with “maa” branded on our fourheads
and “kihooto” carved into our chest.
I am Muthoni,
“the shy one.”
The quit one,
who learned to wield her words
and now speak.
I was forgotten at school one day.
My silent pleas could not reach closed hearts
as I stand tall but invisible.
Enshrouded by darkness,
I try to utter voiceless screams,
But no hero came to my rescue.
Branded by experiences
which should never be.
I was marked!
My pretty little feet
were placed upon a road already built.
Guarded by fences void of understanding.
Consumed by the ocean of false impressions,
I hollered for help
but there was no one to pull me to safety;
not even to give me empathy.
No one saw the treasures
lying dormant inside of me.
Or the beauty yearning for freedom.
Despite the constant assault
to justify my blackness,
efforts to lock me in pre-manufacture moulds,
stringent definitions profiling a black woman.
I conquer!
I rain supreme in who I am.
I am the Kikuyu Princess,
offspring of the nine daughters
of the Huge Sycamore;
sent southwards from “Hakumu”
by the Great Divider.
The Maasai Queen of the Great Rift Vally,
longing to be set free.
“I need not describe the feelings of those
whose dearest ties are rent by that most ir-
reparable evil, the void that present itself to
the soul, and the despair that is exhibited on
the countenance.”
Now,
here I am!
Bound by my inescapable reflections.
Gazing on my image
deep inside the river of destiny.
My quest beckons me!
Ones collective unconscious,
is inescapable.
I want to fully realize my potential,
explode and conquer the heavens.
To display my magnificence
in the fullness of life.
Feed my internal vitality.
Awaken my dancing essence
to articulate poetic motions.
My heart sings sweet melodies.
The sounds of freedom pluck the strings
of my consciousness.
My soul resonate with the steady beat,
with an awaken mind,
my spirit soar like eagles in the sky.
Finding my wellspring of strength,
I lay claim to my throne,
forging ahead to the real me.
Spreading my wings,
feeling the warm wind passing by,
tensing my muscles,
I faithfully take the plunge
to reach the apex of my existence.
Leegal Poet
Wayne Ferron
Wayne Ferron.All rights reserved @ copyright
“I need not describe the feelings of those
whose dearest ties are rent by that most ir-
reparable evil, the void that present itself to
the soul, and the despair that is exhibited on
the countenance.”(Mary Shelly)
