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Depressed
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Poems My eyes roll into the back of my head
Back on the thought of how I wish I was dead
tears stream down my face
once again called a disgrace
unable to function,simply useless
my words truthless
I need to leave this place
Put a gun to my head and empty the clip
Take my soul on a freedom trip
I serve no purpose
I'm just worthless
someone needs to hit "return to sender"
just another offender
Can plead innocent,til shown guilty
Nothing left in me
Too bad the last thing I ever wrote
Was this suicide note
No man, don't do it, you have so much to live for
Bullshit, my heart was ripped from my core
An empty shell with an expired expression
Never learned my lesson
Just a tool of oppression
sending a vibe of negativity
Bringing them all down with me
I do it oh so skillfully
But I don't like it,so end me swiftly
Grant my request
Bury me like the rest
Let all this bullshit be retired
cut through me like razorwire
My fucking skull's on fire
Can't you see i'm in pain?
That it's not a game?
Fucking A, you don't even remember my name
No-one will even give a damn
A name writ in water is all I am
give it time I'll be forgotten
six feet under is were I'll really be rotten
But, it's no big deal it's all drama
He just needs a hug from his mamma
he'll be ok
Yeah ey ok
Ain't that something I wish I could say
Truth is I'm not,my soul is confined
I'm fucking losing my mind
Too bad no-one will find out why
I talk this shit I talk about
or even try
to figure out the words spewed from my mouth
But maybe I'd do better
braving the stormy weather
Get lost in herbal haze
and think of better days
Maybe oh just maybe
If God will let me
I can wake up to a wife and baby
But now is now and the future is coming
But at the rate I'm going I'm stopped and not running
Truth is I feel like crying
As I lay dying
let the heavens rejoice
that the angel of death has finally silenced my voice
may the boatman give me a boatride for free
Maybe the scales will have pity on me
Will I see those fields of green?
Did I really say what I mean?
Or was my message lost
like a bottle out at sea
well at all cost
I need to find some kind of assitance
Because I'm too weak to stop this resistance
Kept going strong all these years
all these tears
and these fears
with all this blood spilt
with all these feelings felt
with all the joy turned sorrow
at the approaching tomorrow
How did I have the balls to say
that the time spent above ground was a good day?
I'm only playing tricks on myself
No spiritual wealth
Only some herbal budhism
and a new taste for alcoholism
a hate for materalism
and a finger and a "fuck you" to the competition
There is no tomorrow for me
I'm on a kamakazi misison
Paranoia was the least of my issues
As your words cut through my nervous tissue
You know what its like to be numb to it all?
Deaf ears turned to pleading calls
Emotions cutting through like the sword
Others reaping my reward
Spend what's left locked away in my room
Welcome the oncoming doom
carve my name on the door to mark my tomb
The walls will talk of my tradegy
But only the floor will listen
the furniture will sit in silence,as the window pane glistens
the bed holds a grip on me
As I vent my travesties
the covers come over me as I drift all to sleep
nothing left to keep
Forever and long my I think deep
