Depressed

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Poems

My eyes roll into the back of my head

Back on the thought of how I wish I was dead

tears stream down my face

once again called a disgrace

unable to function,simply useless

my words truthless

I need to leave this place

Put a gun to my head and empty the clip

Take my soul on a freedom trip

I serve no purpose

I'm just worthless

someone needs to hit "return to sender"

just another offender

Can plead innocent,til shown guilty

Nothing left in me

Too bad the last thing I ever wrote

Was this suicide note

No man, don't do it, you have so much to live for

Bullshit, my heart was ripped from my core

An empty shell with an expired expression

Never learned my lesson

Just a tool of oppression

sending a vibe of negativity

Bringing them all down with me

I do it oh so skillfully

But I don't like it,so end me swiftly

Grant my request

Bury me like the rest

Let all this bullshit be retired

cut through me like razorwire

My fucking skull's on fire

Can't you see i'm in pain?

That it's not a game?

Fucking A, you don't even remember my name

No-one will even give a damn

A name writ in water is all I am

give it time I'll be forgotten

six feet under is were I'll really be rotten

But, it's no big deal it's all drama

He just needs a hug from his mamma

he'll be ok

Yeah ey ok

Ain't that something I wish I could say

Truth is I'm not,my soul is confined

I'm fucking losing my mind

Too bad no-one will find out why

I talk this shit I talk about

or even try

to figure out the words spewed from my mouth

But maybe I'd do better

braving the stormy weather

Get lost in herbal haze

and think of better days

Maybe oh just maybe

If God will let me

I can wake up to a wife and baby

But now is now and the future is coming

But at the rate I'm going I'm stopped and not running

Truth is I feel like crying

As I lay dying

let the heavens rejoice

that the angel of death has finally silenced my voice

may the boatman give me a boatride for free

Maybe the scales will have pity on me

Will I see those fields of green?

Did I really say what I mean?

Or was my message lost

like a bottle out at sea

well at all cost

I need to find some kind of assitance

Because I'm too weak to stop this resistance

Kept going strong all these years

all these tears

and these fears

with all this blood spilt

with all these feelings felt

with all the joy turned sorrow

at the approaching tomorrow

How did I have the balls to say

that the time spent above ground was a good day?

I'm only playing tricks on myself

No spiritual wealth

Only some herbal budhism

and a new taste for alcoholism

a hate for materalism

and a finger and a "fuck you" to the competition

There is no tomorrow for me

I'm on a kamakazi misison

Paranoia was the least of my issues

As your words cut through my nervous tissue

You know what its like to be numb to it all?

Deaf ears turned to pleading calls

Emotions cutting through like the sword

Others reaping my reward

Spend what's left locked away in my room

Welcome the oncoming doom

carve my name on the door to mark my tomb

The walls will talk of my tradegy

But only the floor will listen

the furniture will sit in silence,as the window pane glistens

the bed holds a grip on me

As I vent my travesties

the covers come over me as I drift all to sleep

nothing left to keep

Forever and long my I think deep

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