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 Cracked Foundations

and there beneath the stale smell
of sunkissed raspberry
I inhaled an innocence of her
that still lingered
from a time long before
but I exhaled too soon
and the aroma was gone
I was left with a woman/child scent
that I didn't even recognize

I began searching
her eyes for proof,
proof of what...
I wasn't exactly sure
I only knew I needed
some kind of validation
but I found no depth or truth
in her dark, evasive eyes
only dagger lined corneas
prepared for an attack

so I looked at her feet
while my words
tried to gently break through
but they bounced off her shield
and went spiraling
into eternity
unheard and unfelt
I tried embracing her with my heart
and for a minute
she seem to feel me
and she cried
but she never truly let me in

she stood her unstable ground
like it was a fortress of truth
but I could clearly see
the cracks in her foundation
I knew she would soon fall
and I didn’t know if I could save her

I fell to my knee's and pleaded
"please just try to see, hear, feel....anything"
but she only smirked and began talking
about rattle snakes and purple pens
a hundred friends and her loneliness

I held my head in confusion
where was she, who was she
and what the hell was she talking about

I closed my eyes pleading, begging, and
screaming into unhearing
and uncaring heavens
"Please, help me understand
the insanity of it all...
give me the tools, the words
the actions to save her"
but no answers came
-no answers ever came

when I opened my eyes
she was gone and the only thing
left was a rock at my feet
that was penned
with big, bold, black letters
that said simply "I went home"

and I was left there
on my knee's with hope spilling
from my soul
feeling my foundation crack
beneath me and wondering
will I ever be able to save her
when I have never been
closer to losing me

© LadyRaine