PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

i talk to you on the phone after a long day of texting

we are sweet to each other, i send you kisses on the cheek

i await the moment you visit

so we can do acid

so i can show you my new apartment



its been four years since the day we first met

and after we hang out, i lay numb in my bed

wondering how i could have cried for a good chunk of my life,

whispering your name,

wishing i could tell you all the things i had to say

i have so little to say now

my heart is a rock and i don't even care if its your fault



slowly i force myself to remember

how it felt to love you

and i am still shocked at its intensity,

i want to cry again

my love for you, i'd say, is the only thing for which words are inadequate

because my language never emcompassed such perfection

i would give everything i have felt if i could go back

and walk home with you wearing your jacket

you were a simple boy

and i loved you with all my heart



i'm scared, i might have ruined myself

i should have let myself fall out of love slower

i should have cried more and remembered every detail of you

all i wanted was to have the pain stop...

all i wanted was to forget that you didn't care...

i smoked so much weed and stopped giving a shit about love

i felt so powerful jumping over fences after midnight,

kissing boys who weren't you,

one boy, two boys, three, hiding them from each other

i hurt people with no regret

has it stopped yet?

my love, has it stopped yet?



so now you come back, like a fucking fairy tale,

and act like you care

tell me you were a fool and didn't know what you were doing

but you can't do that!

not now!

i've already killed myself!

i don't need those words anymore, can't comprehend them,

don't understand fairy tales,

cut my heart out like a flopping fish and tossed it to the ocean



so now i text you and send you kisses and tell you

i'm excited

to see you

but honestly, this isn't happening

i am not that girl anymore,

i am a destruction machine,

more powerful than you ever were or ever will be,

you can't do this! not now!

i loved you too much and already died for it!

i already died for you! i already died!

i already died! you killed me and can't clear your conscience

by bringing me back to life!

i am dead!

i am dead!

go away and leave me with my pain!