Antithesis

Folder: 
High School

Many years ago I wrote

letters to a girl.

And then, thought that one day YOU would be a letter...

that shade of sadness in a black world.

But I have entered an abyss

deeper than any I had yet explored,

and I am waking up to realize...

I'm someone I've never met before.



Where are you?

I thought I was calling your name for awhile back there...

and I felt you beside me...

but now I look around, and you're nowhere.

Why am I clutching thin air?

Expecting you to free me?



Dear Jess,

you are the only letter now.

because everyone else has fallen out.

They are too real and

not beautiful and

there is no room for assumption.

I cannot feel that

I have lost a home cause

I'm high on the consumption.



Fuck my worry notes.

and pretending hearts are tender

Fuck waiting to return home,

and trying to defend her.

Fuck looking in the mailbox,

and finding nothing but

my own,

marked,

"RETURN TO SENDER"

Fuck my long poems about how I love you.

I don't even know you anymore-

You're someone I've never met before.

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