Author Information
My Father's Cigarettes
Some of my earliest memories are smoky; not because of my bad memory but because of my family’s habits. My mother and father smoked so often I used to think all the pollution in the city was theirs. Though there were two moving chimneys in my house, my sisters and me have never smoked a cigarette in our lives. My father didn’t want us to make the bad habits he used to make when he was as young as us. Though eventually my mother stopped smoking eventually when I was younger, my dad could only slow down and smoke less but never actually stop. I can have the same kind of problems with addictions and I’m so similar to my dad that I know if I got into an addictive habit I’ll never be able to stop and break out of it, so that’s one of the positive parts of his addiction. It might not seem like that much of a positive thing but I’ve always been grateful to know my limits before hurting myself.
The other positive part of it is how often the smell of smoke reminds me of him. Every time I’m at a restaurant, with friends or family or in the streets and pass by someone smoking a cigarette that distinctive smell always reminds me of him. Even when he no longer lived at our home and I didn’t see him nearly as often, I know he’s always looking out for me and that dirty smell always reminds me if I ever forget. Not only does it remind of that but also of all the times we’ve spent together. Every cold Christmas Eve night, sighting in the backyard as he and some of my cousins smoked and drinked and laughed. Every profound conversation we had at the kitchen table whenever I needed help deciding or doing something in my life. Every time my sisters and me would chastise him and make him smoke next to a window or an open door to keep the smell away from the room. Every car ride to the United States, with the wind blowing in my head to keep the smell out. Every time I smell any cigarette smoke, no matter the situation, it always remind of him. And the best part is that no matter what the situation is, my father will always put off of his cigarette if me or my sisters ask him to.
