Through the many lessons
i have always been
that which I know
to be something else
would destroy that which I am.
My heart is afloat in dangerous water
I can feel its desire
It wants to jump into the storm
My heart begs me to let go
So that it may finally be free
How can I tell my heart that it is wrong?
My heart cannot understand
All it does is feel.
"Im breaking, I'm breaking"
It screams in pain
I search for the paingiver
I find my mind
Cold and cruel
A machine that detests the weak
At its feet lie pieces of heart
All of them taken from my own
I stand between them
Friends with the two at war
My heart is angry
My mind calculates
And finds a rope
That it may bind my heart.
And when its finally calm
My mind begins to speak.
"I do not hate you heart,
I cannot hate, for that is your world.
All I can do is know,
And I know you are killing us.
You must be strong
Even when you feel the world is cruel,
For there is a different world to come
And I know that we must find it,
For I have heard it holds your joy"
My heart, now, only softly cries
It wants tomorrow
it needs tomorrow
It looks around no longer for escape
Curses my mind that it will not gamble
Perhaps even hates it still,
but it feels that the mind knows
It knows how to survive
And it will not be destroyed.