Its very sad to say but I have a crude understanding of the world not being fair
I could see my mother die and I'd fail to cry cause honestly I could accept her not being there
I was told at ten (it was way back when) that men stay strong tears never pass there cheek
So I stood at the funeral of an uncle I didn't know and watched a man accept his sons death.. meek
Again I was 12 and slung into hell but standing at another mans funeral I didn't know that well
I just wanted to go home Long Island City .... I stood silent no tears and watch as the casket fell
But I failed him a couple times I'd be a liar if I didn't speak the truth character degradation
He hit her repeatedly she came home bruised I went out and hurt him gave him the "ol 1,2"
I came home triumphant .... She said "I hate you"
I didn't understand what that side of can love do
She went back .... I cried ... She hates me she never said that ... I cried .... I'll never defend you again
My mother lap saved my face her word dried those tears
I loved her completely one hand I asked of her one circle as a promise encircled her finger
A lot went on I tell her I'm mostly to blame I left with no redemption a lil guilty feelings still linger
The things I did for her were many but in the name of love or lack thereof the things we do
Relationship cracking like rotten wood but it was too much she sits around on repeat "boyfriend # 2"
She sat around and whispered things to an evil troll doll ..... she exclaims loudly she can't wait
They saw it they saved my face .... Friends.... Even her brother a shoulder .... I cried .... Cruel fate
..... I failed him again .... Never again.... I'll fail me no more .... Tears don't belong to me there is no joy in them for me