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“Bhava Sagara Tarono Karono Hey …Robinandana Bandana Khandano Hey …

Swaranagata Kinkara Bhito Mone …Gurudeva Daya Kara Dina Jane…”



Break of dawn, grandfather’s melodic hymns woke Mona and her two little brothers Middy and Tiny from their sleep - all three rushing from bed into his arms calling “Dado, Dado, Dado” each cuddling to occupy his lap in competition.



Taking a break from his prayers grandfather would hand his three grandchildren to grandmother for a shower, a condition laid by Dado if they were to join him in prayers. Eager to participate they were most obedient little angels.



Wet hair neatly combed, dressed fresh the tiny tots, sat with palms clasped in prayer flanking the elderly man clad in dhoti, repeating “Bhava sagara…” chorus in baby accent. From decorations of sweet smelling flowers, and their chants the deities enlivened, an ornate ambience of opulence reigned.



Early days, every summer, Mr Jyotish Disso-Roy from “Opar Bangla” visited his eldest daughter Rani in Park Circus Calcutta. His younger daughter Madhuri married to Paresh Biswas in Tollygunge and his only son Robbie Disso-Roy an engineer, a fresher, newly stationed at Durgapore.



Though, his sibling established in the western part of Bengal nevertheless he could not give up his occupation on the other side, thus returning again and again, against the wishes of relatives and children. After all, the middle brother was still on the other side too.



Years by, this uncertain oscillation made Mr Disso-Roy and his wife Jyotsna pretty upset about their future. Rani proposed her father to take a voluntary retirement and live with her forever in Calcutta. Self-esteem of Mr Disso-Roy crashed the proposal; living with his daughter.



Though his son in law Shashanka Bhattacharya, a gem of a person never objected to their permanent company, Mr Disso-Roy felt embarrassed. Actually, Shashanka felt it would be a blessing to have them around as his obligation in the Railways kept him often compulsory, away, and Rani had to manage the three kids all by herself.



With tiny fingers, Mona the little artist traced maps of India from plastic soapbox covers and sold her pieces to Dado in exchange of invisible notes. His pocket bulged with outsized collection of scraps, which he literally carried back to show his colleagues, proud of his loving, affectionate granddaughter from India. Dado, was Mona’s hot favourite.



However, every evening he took Tiny for a walk, really for sweetmeats at ‘K. C. Maiti,’ and managed to convince Mona out of their way. Therefore, Mona preferred to play with her friend Kuku while grandmother baby-sitting Middy, kept him busy with anecdotes. Every summer Rani eagerly waited for her parents to come.



Time flew along lines of procrastinate, wavering, and visits. The children grew to schools. Holidays in December, found Rani alongside children, visit her husband in Asansol where Shashanka transferred but did not disturb to shift the whole family, as the kids were progressive in Calcutta schools.





On one afternoon in Asansol, Mona heard her parents repeatedly read aloud a letter from Uncle Robbie, something very unusual. Emergency in voice they discussed “Robbie had a Registration Marriage.” Key word on their lips sounded Registration. In the letter Robbie requested Shashanka, to negotiate with the girl’s family because the marriage was undisclosed.



As the eldest son in law, Shashanka Bhattacharya had to handle the situation responsibly. Taking leave, family in tow he rushed to Calcutta. Now, his brother in law Robbie needed all possible support for a social marriage in consent with the girl’s family. Also, he had to convince Rani’s father of Robbie’s independent choice.



Shashanka felt great relief when Mrs and Mr Disso-Roy received the news unhurt, visibly cool.



Robbie introduced Seta Bose-Roy to Ranididi and Shashanka at their Park Circus home. Before 1962, love marriages were seldom, a trend began thus needed a cover up - arrange marriages of proposal. Careful plans were set to visit Seta’s father. Mona would accompany Shashanka but act as if she saw Seta for the first time. No crying Mamima as Mona made rapid relationship with Seta calling her Mamima straight away.



Mona acted accurately. Mr Shashanka Bhattacharya politely approached Seta’s father, Advocate Anil Bose-Roy who had seven daughters and four sons, Seta the eldest among his daughters. Mr S Bhattacharya’s proposal for his brother in law with no dowry demands impressed the girl’s family.



Pleasantries exchanged at the girl’s house in Tollygunge, in spite disquieting mosquitoes. One of Seta’s sisters brought the Flit pump and sprayed mosquito deterrents. Another one burnt incense to neutralize the strong smell.



This match was a good start for the family, felt Mrs Bose-Roy as Robbie not only handsome had a very comfortable income, an aspect all mothers found attractive for their daughters…





Happy Mr Jyotish Disso-Roy, Mrs Jyotsna Disso-Roy invited relatives, friends, far and wide. Boubhat at Park Circus marriage ceremony in Tollygunge, all marriage rituals over, the couple would leave for Durgapore.



January 1963 the house was abuzz. Decorators set up tarpaulin, colourful Pandal on terrace, and passageway. Entrance dome housed the Shehenai group. Flowers highlighted the premises. Gorgeous chandeliers replaced the room fans, as it was winter.



Rani blessed Seta with a pair of weighty golden Choor. Madhuri presented a pair of golden earring.



Costs shot up. Budget exceeds stopped Robbie, auxiliary expenditure. He could not afford further. Tatta, bride’s gold jewellery, saris, suits; etc for in law … and Robbie forgot to buy the bride’s special Reception sari.



Ranididi came to his rescue, in addition gold she spent a years saving, buying Seta an expensive Benarasi sari for the reception. Mona clearly remembered accompanying her mother to Traders Assembly in Gariahat Market and choosing the best piece along with matching veil. They also ordered for floral jewelleries, crown, and garlands for the Wedding Night Phool Sajjya.





Seta looked magnificent in her grand sari. Wearing ornaments of flowers, a gold bejewelled bride shimmered through her veil. Guests poured in offering vibrant packets received with a gesture Namaskar by Seta. Madhuri, pen paper in hand listed the gifts neatly. She was a great help powdering Seta’s nose, asking Mona to fetch water for the thirsty bride...  



More flowers arrived from Seta’s house and the fragrance mingled tunes of Shehenai, boisterous guests, relatives calling out for Robbie, the ideal bridegroom in ethnic outfit.



Seta could not hold her tears. Incessantly the camera clicked.



“Why is she crying Mashie?” Mona puzzled.

“She is not crying they are tears of joy,” answered Madhuri Mashie. “You too will have tears of joy when you grow up and marry.”

“Mamima please do not cry; I feel sad,” Mona kissed Seta drying her eyes with handkerchief. Seta smiled.



Groups poured in and out. Mr Jyotish Disso-Roy escorted batches to the terrace for dinner. White papers rolled over rows of long tables. Fresh dark green banana leaf cut into square plates, on it, burnt-clay tumbler placed at corner finished with lemon wedge and teaspoon of salt each. Wearing folds of red white check aprons, Robbie’s friends served with big spoons dug into brass pails for mouth-watering savoury before heavy on guests’ plates.



Sumptuous menu of starters, fried aubergine, green leaves, luchi, moog dhal, mocha, followed by peas and cauliflower mix vegetables, kofta curry, Palau, fish kalian, mutton curry. Chutney, papa-dam concluded with sweet curd, succulent cottage cheese ball in syrup and sweetmeats. Lips red from munching peppermint flavoured beetle leaf mouth freshener, the guests left happy satisfied, blessing the newly weds generously.





Mona wanted a sister for cousin; felt God answer her prayers, when Seta and Robbie had a baby girl on 25the October. Dado and Dido received the news with ecstasy and named her Roma. Unfortunately, in summer, Jyotsna had a hipbone fracture that cancelled their Calcutta trip. Instead, grandchildren merrymaking, hospital doctors, and nurses consumed time. Old couple were sad.



Next year Jyotsna prepared coconut cakes for eager grandchildren waiting impatiently on the other side. On arrival in Park Circus, the grandmother Jyotsna distributed presents disclosing rough and rude customs check, as if they had contraband. A disgusted grandfather complained bitterly.



This time Rani decided to hold her parents back forever. It was unbearable to see her parents suffer helpless. “We shall not return,” announced Rani’s father much to his daughter’s surprise and relief. Overjoyed Rani informed her husband the first thing when Shashanka returned from his tour. No more teary eyes parting.



To her dismay, Rani foxed because her father determined to stay in Durgapore with his son. Her implore did not work. Shashanka advised Rani to let go that it was natural for the father to choose his son for permanent residence ship. She ought to be happy her parents would remain forever in India. He convinced his emotional wife, Rani.



At Howrah station, the children and Rani waved a goodbye. Little did Shashanka, Rani or the kids know was that to be the last seeing off for them?





At Durgapore, Robbie received his parents touching their feet taking blessings.



“Ma Roma rushes through the house like a tornado; she keeps us on tenterhooks,” excitedly Robbie.

“I can hardly wait these few minutes, how is my Bouma?” enquired Jyotsna.

“Ma, she is a busy bee with Roma’s acrobatics!” Robbie answered.

“Are you comfortable in your seat Baba?” Robbie asked concerned. His father underwent bottom operation two years back and needed snug seat.



Few days went in bliss. Roma was Mr Jyotish Disso-Roy’s heart, taking to each other wonderfully. Her large eyes full games, old couple in seventh heaven. Dado, Dido in demand for everything Roma did. Seta astonished at her daughter’s swift friendship with unknown grandparents. “Blood is thicker than water,” reminded Robbie.



Seta served her parent in law lunch, fish curry in extra bowls. Roma pranced cosy in grandfather’s lap. Happily feeding her tiny pieces of fish both enjoyed a great time eating. Suddenly Seta noticed the on going. Rushing into the room snatched Roma away, thrashed the two-year-old blue black, hysterical for eating from Dado’s hand.



Innocent baby wailed. No one could stop Seta. Jyotsna perplexed, a shocked Mr Disso-Roy asked his daughter in law the reason for her rage. Why she was beating his granddaughter mercilessly. She heard nothing in frenzy but behaved as if her father in law had contagious disease…



Instantly Jyotsna recollected a day before Boubhat. While serving lunch on a bronze plate she objected Seta call her husband by first name. “Not done in Disso-Roy family,” affectionately chiding Seta. Her comment enraged an accomplished Seta crazy; she threw the plate against the wall very hard. The noise deafened and the bronze cracked. Visibly embarrassed Jyotsna became mum.



Upset at Seta, a broken Mr Disso-Roy stopped lunch washed hand, tugged Jyotsna turning away from Durgapore forever, tears rolling down his cheeks. Heartbroken he did not meet his other children either and returned to “Opar Bangla” for good.



Rani and Madhuri came to know of his departure from India only after he reached the other side. No details leaked, only Mr Disso-Roy carried blame, left hot headed. A loving man stoned severed connections with offspring.





Much water flowed through the Ganges. Roma had another younger sister Shreya. In Calcutta Mona was in class eight, Middy in class six, Tiny in class four. All deprived of grandparents’ nearness. Information by visitors about Dado Dido’s falling victim to 1971 war in “Opar Bangla” made everyone inconsolably sad.



Tragedy struck the Disso-Roy family. Roma took ill. Her mild fever with joint ache prolonged, from bad to worse and the doctors at Durgapore could not diagnose. Robbie consulted reputed doctor Monee Chetri from Calcutta. He detected rheumatic heart. However, it was too late for feeble Roma; snatched away from her parents before the best heart specialist, could treat. At the break of dawn snapping every connection, Roma departed from earth.