Emotionally wrecked, I was in need
of special succor. But you gave no heed
to that; then came from you no approbation,
no comprehension, and no validation.
Not thinking in the least what I might want,
defiant of my silent expectation,
you failed to offer me encouragement.
What was important to me at that time
seemed meaningless to you, with neither rhyme
nor reason for such shallow apathy
that you continued to present to me.
So I broke off the friendship and projected
upon you all my long pent up frustration.
But in your tower, settled so comfortably,
you took no notice, nor were you affected.
Author's Notes/Comments:
In 1981, over a year past graduation with what was then a useless degree; having experienced failure in my first employment, which was replaced by a job that had absolutely no future or interest for me; after two very difficult relationships that broke up dramatically and painfully, I found myself, by the autumn of 1981, in a spiritual darkness that seemed to hold no change for escape. Even now, almost three decades beyond it, the very memory still gives me pause for shudder. Toward several friends from my youth, I lashed out---expecting them, even demanding them, to provide some relief, some way of escape, from the darkness that enclosed me. Those friendships, which are now, at best, acquaintanceships, never recovered fully from my verbal immaturity.
