During the last camping weekend I attended
while still a member of our small town's larger
scouting troop, you---Farley, one of our most decorated
scouts, a senior in high school to my limited, awkward
sixth grade experience---led me from the campsite of
wildly prejudiced haters, prudes and bullies to an
isolated grove, surrounded. screened, by a circular
copse of high, ancient trees. Watered by an narrow
spring, and illuminated by shafts of sunlight, the
grove's surface layer of grass seemed was softly
thick, such that you removed your hiking boots.
Then you pulled your shirt from your cargo pants'
waistband, unbuttoned it, and tossed it onto a
nearby rock. I inhaled deeply to enjoy the subtle
scent of your tan socks mingled with the natural
fragrances that surrounded us. I was impressed by
your long, black hair's cascade (years of growth:
troop administrators attempted once, and only
once, to compel a compliant trim, but your maternal
grandfather, one of our state's most successful
Litigators, had issued a warning as yet unforgotten).
I was aroused by, and began to engorge to, the
two prominent and seductively attractive (and suggestive!)
features of your bared torso. You invited me to be
seated with you,, and then you put your arms around me,
deftly pulling me into a lean against you, and feeling
your gentle strength around me. I think our respective
respirations even synchronized. For the first time
since I began to accept my given nature as it was (and
not as my parents commanded it to be), I felt a relaxed
contentment. You recognized my fascination with your
socks, although you did not embarrass or shame for it;
although you flexed your feet and wiggled your toes
repeatedly and seductively for my rising appreciation.
You knew I was not ready for intimacy; just this, this
comfort in the midst of the kind of weekend I had
learned, early and quickly, to fear and to avoid
whenever possible. We returned late to the campsite;
dusk was, by then, very near; you had not bothered to
put on your boots or shirt until after we arrived. No
one attempted to bully or berate me for the weekend's
remainder. Although you were not always in sight, I
felt your presence. Your merit had improved my life.
Your compassion's honor had rescued me as from a precipice.
J-Called