So you’ve been diagnosed with Crohn’s disease.
Not to worry! My name’s Rachel and I’m here to be your guide through this trying time.
There are 3 simple steps to becoming a Survivor of This Disease.
Step 1! Get acquainted with el baño.
Now, I’m sure you’ve used a bathroom before, but for your sake, I hope you’ve enjoyed the experience.
The restroom is going to be your new home
Find a bathroom with an outlet, you can plug in a phone charger or even a toaster oven
Public bathrooms
Whenever you leave your house for any reason, make sure you know how close you are to the nearest bathroom. At all times.
And when you get there, remember to go through the routine stall-check: the door locks, the gap between the stall door and the wall isn’t uncomfortably wide, there’s toilet paper on the roll, the toilet seat is clean, the flusher works
If you have any sense of shame, you’re going to have to get rid of that right now because you’re going to be the girl that shits in the school bathroom.
Bathrooms will become the place you feel the safest
When you’re in pain or even if you’re just emotionally hurt you will lock yourself in the stall and, forgetting about your shame, lay down in the fetal position on the tile floor or the linoleum or whatever the hell gas station bathroom floors are made out of and you will cry, or you will whimper, or you will do nothing. Whatever you do, I recommend you do it silently so as not to disturb anyone else in the restroom.
Step 2! Know what triggers your symptoms.
You’re going to have to get familiar with the way your disease works. The longer it takes you to do this, the more irritated your doctor will get with you, so it is best to start quickly.
One of the best ways to do this is to create a food journal where you log everything you eat and then log whenever you have pain, and try to find relationships. Of course, this process is much easier if you don’t eat anything at all, because you won’t have to go through the annoying process of writing in your journal three times a day, and as an added bonus, your body hurts a lot less when there’s no food going through you to hurt you. Remember, food is the enemy here, and in order to defeat it, you must defeat hunger. Don’t be alarmed when you stand naked in front of the mirror and see what's left of your body, a tattered sack of bones and bruised skin. This is a natural part of the process. If you let your body collapse enough, it might become weak enough to forget the taste of pain.
Step 3! Get treatment.
It’s as simple as trying every medicine your doctor can throw at you until either you’re cured, the side effects outweigh the pain of your disease, or you’re dead.
It will start as a medicine drawer in your desk, medicine bottles in your purse, medicine in your bathroom cabinets
But before you know it there is medicine in the dust in your house, medicine braided into your hair, medicine escaping your body through your tear ducts
Pills piled up in every dark crevice of the house you used to call a home
But now your home is the restroom with the door that locks, with the gap between the door and the wall tighter than the grip you have on the days before your diagnosis