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I visit the restful place inside my head again.

It’s a place of wonder and serenity.

It’s a place I wish to stay forever.

Yet I have to fight for it every day.

Fighting off my insomnia

To attain this respite of happens.

Then enjoy my slumber with peace.

Yet the few hours of slumber come and go.

Days of sleep come and go.

Weeks and months come and go.

Yet I must hunt for this dream.

Or else face my own consuming nightmares.

My own twisted realm of hate and loathing.

Deceits and never ending horrors.

Yet I am the master of it all.

It all comes from my mind.

And yet I have no control over anything.

Not even my self in these horror filled nights.

Not even my own mind can comprehend.

This total horror I face.

It is to much and forces me to stay awake.

Only if I could understand these nightmares.

Only if I could sit back and read these dreamscapes.

Only if I could talk about them and know them.

But once awake.

I forget everything, except the worst of the pain.

So in turn I am my own nightmare.

I am my own worst dreamscape.

I am the only resin behind my insomniac dreams.