my answer when you ask me why

i am sad

because i don't know why i'm sad

or do i?

i figure if you wanted to be with someone else

you wouldn't still be with me

or would you?

these feelings hit me with an unanticipated force

that knocks the breath out of me

i stare at all these happy people

who stare back in at me

with pity

when a stranger sees my need for comforting

before you do

i come to a frightening realization

as i have many times before

that you may not want me

when you see i'm vulnerable, and troubled by something i don't understand

the weight of that, and this

causes me to retreat back inside my own brain

where it's all safe

free from wondering, "what's wrong?"

when i don't even know

Author's Notes/Comments: 

5-8-07

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