In all of this
feelings for two women . . .
so out of my norm
I had to stop and inform
myself
that I'm not obliged to put either attraction on a shelf
because. . .
neither of them want me
and most probably don't even know I want them
so I am free
and not guilty
of not being faithful
you cannot be faithful to someone with whom you are not in a relationship!
so in my fantsies I can, indeed, double-dip. . .
but I wouldn't,
too confusing for me I'm too used to only wanting one at a time,
I couldn't switch it up that quick,
it would make my head spin
make me sick!!
Author's Notes/Comments:
I was feeling guilty, because what happened is I felt that powerful attraction first but when I heard trhe woman was married I stuffed those feelings, then I went ont to meet and work with the other woman and fell for her but in the last few months I have run into the other woman at work a couple of brief times, and even though I outwardly practically ignored her it had the effect of uncorking that bottle of suppressed feeling and suddenly I found myself attracted to two women at once very out of the norm for me I am generally a one woman at a time woman!!! So since the one attraction is more overwhelming than the other but the other one I know better and love who she seems to be since I know her better i was feeling guilty for spending more time lately thinking of the one I don't know to whom I have the smoking hot attraction. But I really don't need to, I mean that's silly I'm not with either of them and not likely to be in the future, but. . . if a miracle occurs I'll choose and commit.
