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Don't call it a crush, no baby, don't call it a crush



It would hurt way too damn much



You know I love you more than any words can say



Although every day I fear your touch







What would you think of all of my scars



The beautiful patterns made to show my pain



The truth to let the world know when I was beaten and marred



Crimson tears rolled down naively and in vain







Your fingertips would find the truth I hid from the world



The scalding pain I hid within



From when I couldnt take anything except to be scarred



What would you think of me then?







Don't you see the tears I cry when I wake up in the middle of the night



Wondering where I went wrong, asking why was I always causing fights



Cannot look in the mirror, cannot face myself...



and yet you love me no matter what I look like, no matter how many scars I have or how many tears I cry







I cannot figure it out, how you could love someone as awful as me



Full of hatred and anger...lashing out at anyone who gets in my way



Not knowing if I can live this charade for one more single day



and yet you are always there on the other side, waiting patiently for me







Don't know where all this pain and depression comes from, I havent a clue where it started



All I know is I feel so broken inside, is this how it feels for all the broken hearted?



I want things to be okay for once, I want things to all work out



But I can't stand one more day inside myself, I want to scream and shout







What do you really see in me?  You say that  you see all these things that I have never noticed in myself before



You are the only one that can cheer me up in my darkest and hardest moments, when I don't want to smile or laugh, you turn my mood around and make it all better



You help me more than anyone ever has and yet you don't try in the way anyone ever has.....you don't feed me advice or lies or any of that crap, you are just there for me, and let me know that you love me...and thats all I could ever ask for...



I just wish that I was not so damn insecure.  That I could fight back these feelings of shame and guilt that I hide so deep within and forgive myself for all I lack.....because you are there to fill the missing pieces and complete me







Love, is it worth the risk of the heartbreak attached to the name....?



If you win the game...in the end what is your prize?



Is it a cycle that never ends consisting of lies, betrayel, deceit and shame..



or does it at one point stop when you find the right one that you will spend forever with.....the one that will stick by your side till the day that you die..?







All these questions, I wonder if I will ever find the answers to



Or if they will always go unknown....



but as time goes by and love holds on....



Another piece of my heart gets sewn







Maybe one day I will be fully complete



Love it can really be so sweet



Almost gave up on life and love and everything in between



But glad I gave it all another chance....theres so much more out there left to be seen







So, don't call it a crush baby, no, don't you dare call it a crush..



Just take my hand...and my heart....and promise do not break it.....



and be gentle.... as you discover all the scars that go hidden....



and continuing loving me as you do.....because I know the truth.....







I will always love you...