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And so I scandalize my reputation by drinking cheap old man beers from the shelf of shame.  It’s a faux dive bar and I need to impress hipsters that aren’t worthy of holding my jock strap.  I order a Hamms or a Schmidts or a Genny Cream Ale. Different ones available at different bars.

Beer snobs recoil

my scandalous choice shocks them

I gleefully drink

Almost all of the old man beers are still being made by other companies and it has become trendy for bars to offer them on what is called the Shelf of Shame.  They will always be cheap and will often come in specials paired with cheap rotgut whiskey or even cheap tequila.  I justify my insolence by citing my fondness of history.  These are historic regional beers in a bygone era of our history.  It allows me to get buzzed without breaking the bank.

Friends don’t understand

Watching their perplexed faces

I just feel content