Love is constant and firm
It is the foundation on which all else should be built
It is forgiving and kind and selfless in the ways of the heart
It is shown in different ways and it has no rules
Love might be $100 in bags of dried mangos
Or a small canvas of the Tiger King after a huge blow up
It might be elementary school flirting
Lighthearted and playful
Real love has to come from real people and I’ve learned that you’ve been that way with me
So real and so you and I feel honored that you’ve given me that
My whole life, I lived a life of rules. Everything was laid out in steps. I knew where I was going next, what my next steps would be and what they should look like when I was done with them. I don’t know how to exist without a plan laid out. But it’s also something that deeply suffocated me growing up. I never wanted to conform to any expectations. It’s why I never applied to Harvard, when I know I had what it took to get in. It’s why I never dressed like a pretty girl. And also why I chose not to marry someone who’s life resembled mine. When our lives became one, I got what a wanted, I got away from having to meet expectations, but I didn’t know how to understand things that were different than what I was used to. An action not taken, when it normally would have been in my world, meant something was wrong. And so many times in my mind I was weighing our relationship against a checklist. I don’t know how to exist without one. I wouldn’t trade you for the world. Teach me how to let go. Make me feel safe to just let go