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There is a heavy weight
Upon my forgiving heart.
The dark angels that walked
Through me will not leave or part.
Feelings began to spread
And consumed my untouched mind.
Any relief from the pain
I cannot seem to find.
Caring eyes are glazing
Over, after all is lost.
The tears are now crawling down
With no meaningful cost.
Sleepless nights and no hunger
Pains are all I can see.
I wish to be left alone.
Lone, I want to be.
If I can’t end the torture,
No one else should suffer.
My life, compared to another
Should not be any rougher.
There, I cause no harm.
And no one’s able to hurt me.
No one can enter
Because I have hidden the key.
I’ll keep my pretending smile
To hide what it covers.
So I endure, within my heart,
No more than others.
January 6, 2003