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rants#!
what has become of life. it seems that i waste more time as i get older. i feel i should be doing so much but in the end i do nothing of any consequence. what happened where did it all go wrong. im not sure. i look around at my life at the present state and i have to admit i really dont like whats going on. its been a week since the end of my spring term at the universtiy. i fail to regognize the name of the institution, because, well it reaaly doesnt matter anymore. it seems that nothing really matters anymore. i got nothing to do but shoot my mouth off. it seems the greatist tragedy in my life is that i have nothing....no no one to share it with. whether its a superficial dream or just a need for some sort of social contact im not sure. its relavent that it doesnt matter anymore. i have no more dreams, i have no more wishes . because in my youth i have learned these things are pointless whats the use in having a dream when your destined to fail. i feel i have the anti - midas touch. everything i touch instead of turning into gold just dies. i know im probably one of the only other people that share this sentiment. most kids my age im 20 yet im still a child, have freinds and things to do. but life has passed me by. what happened where did i go. im still not sure where i belong, i quite sure that im not good at anything. a life time of fucking things up has riddled me into shambles. i have no confidence, i ve always felt my life was some great tragedy and well its pretty much playing out that way. im dying one minute at a time. what am i to do. life passes me by but i really dont care. i have no more motivating factor anymore. im not even sure i want to go to school anymore im really not sure what im supposed to do anymore, im not artistic im not intelligent, i am another dependent being on the face of the earth leaching off the life of others like a parisite. i used to be happy, at least i think i was. i was once in love or in deep infatuation it passes now, but honestly for that wasted period of time i wasnt happy. i dont know what makes me happy anymore i dont know where to go from here it seems everything i do leads me to nowhere. college the basis of higher learning has been a complete waste of time. we are the lost and dejected souls of a new millenium that has no great war no great derpession . let go let go let go let go let go
just slide.....
"im not artistic im not intelligent" Erny who lied to you? Or are you lying to yourself? I know, I dont know you so I have no right to an opinion or judgements. But based upon the work I have read, your artistic and intelligent work. Your work is reflective of you. Your true self. So tell me Erny, Who lied to you? And do you still feel this way?